*Jingle* Promotional image of the Weeeeek
This one is promoting car insurance, by illustrating the fact that all you need to do to get wanked off in a lay-by is wear a traffic cop uniform you bought off eBay.
Yorkshire women will do pretty much anything, it turns out.
Yorkshire women will do pretty much anything, it turns out.
Diva drivers flirt to keep a clean licence
Flirtatious females admit to using their feminine charm to flirt their way out of a parking ticket.
A YouGov survey has revealed that one in four women drivers would give a bat of their eyelashes or a hint of cleavage as means of avoiding or reducing penalty points.
In a survey of 2,181 drivers Diva, a new sophisticated, comprehensive car insurance provider specifically designed for women found that 34% of 18-24 year olds said they'd give or would consider giving a traffic warden the come on - brandishing young women as the most brazen behind the wheel.
The mature driver has more driving decorum, with 61% of over 45 year olds refusing to even consider flirting if caught flouting the law.
Drivers from Yorkshire displayed the most temptress tendencies - 25% said they'd turn on the charm if faced with potential penalty points, while 7% of Londoners admitted to already having had a go at charming their way out of trouble.
Head of Diva, Kaye Sutcliffe said: "Diva is car insurance designed specifically for women, and we wanted to delve into a diva's mind and see what makes us girls tick. At Diva we think women are better drivers which is why we have negotiated such excellent rates for women. But I'm not sure guys realise just how shrewd women are when it comes to getting themselves out of trouble. Flirting is just one more device divas deploy to get what they want behind the wheel."
Diva shops around to find the best quotes on car insurance for women. Visit Diva's new website www.divainsurance.co.uk to see the competitive deals available for women drivers and useful motoring advice on everything from lessons in car maintenance to tips on how to buy a second hand car.
ENDS
Picture Caption:
A diva driver attempting to flirt her way out of a parking ticket!
Notes to Editors
• All figures are from YouGov Plc. Total sample size was 2,181 adults. Fieldwork was undertaken from 4th to 7th July 2008. The survey was carried out online. The figures have been weighted and are representative of all GB adults (aged 18+).
Item posted at 2:32 PM
12 Comments:
She doesn't appear to be wearing a seatbelt either. So presumably flirting with the section of tarmac that she's going to smash face-first into at sixty miles per hour (after being thrown from the vehicle)also works.
Female driver - "You're a lovely piece of motorway covering, aren't you (giggles). Don't hurt me when I land.
Ashphalt - "Shut up and die in the shape of a broken swastika, glass-face."
See? Doesn't work, does it?
Picture taken from the POV of male passenger sneaking up behind distracted traffic warden with a half-brick
She's so nasty, I'd get a bigger erection thinking about the commission from the parking ticket.
Thanks, but no thanks.
Definitely would not.
Diva, indeed...
The copper is obviously contemplating drawing his gun and shooting that expression of her face. He didn't decide on what excuse to use for it afterwards though.
His hands are tingling!
Moments later he remembered he wasn't a copper anymore. He got demoted for trying to shoot a similar expression off of his wife's face. His hand grabbed for his gun should be, but instead of doing his famous 'fast draw', all he touched was a remote control for cartickets.
He had an angry wank when he got home. Then he practiced his fast draw with a waterpistol, while dreading his teary eyes in the mirror. A sad wank followed. He shook his fist -glistening with semen- at the patchy ceiling. "I will reach the top again, you'll see," he groaned.
A knock on the door. Parking Attendant tried to shield his eyes from the acrid morning sun. Another night of wanking, self-loathing and alcoholabuse survived. He stumbled to the door while transferring his morning wood to a less prominent position. Despite the efforts, however, his stained underwear attested to his perverted loneliness.
He opened the door. It was the woman from yesterday. The one with the hideous expression, whom he tried to shoot with his carticket remote. "Are you alright?" she asked, with the same retarded smile she carried the day before. He considered punching her in the face, but feared the sudden movements would cause his still saluting penis to whip out. That would be embarrassing.
I was going to write a funny story too. I even did a couple of paragraphs. None of it was funny so I deleted it.
I just thought you should know.
Bye then.
Don´t worry about it, phorenzik. My story bombed too.
I'll end it quickly: they get married. She becomes overweight, like most women. He remains a wanker, with his daily reading of Idiot Toys as the only escape from the numbing apathy he calls life. They had a kid, that was a positive. He died of an allergic reaction to strawberries though, that kinda counterbalances the positive.
That male passenger with the brick could've saved them a lot of time. Too bad he chickened out.
You aren't a parking attendant are you Enn? Written from the heart...
It's not based on me, although I do wank a lot.
They needed a fucking survey to work out that dopey jugged-up birds will flash the charms to get out of something they did wrong?!??! Paid for by my taxes of course!
Fuck me, this country is just being spunked out of existance!
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