Suspect the face-massaging thing is just a legitimate front so that Boots & Superdrug agree to stock it.

You could fit her head in that blue compartment, so perhaps it’s a cheap home cryogenic suspension solution.

“HOW CAN WE POSSIBLY NOT HAVE ANY CHEESE? LAST WEEK’S SHOPPING CAME TO £179 AND WE DON’T HAVE ANY CHEESE? NO I DON’T WANT LOBSTER BISQUE INSTEAD. BRING ME THREE BOTTLES OF SMIRNOFF MULE.”

“See me after class, Jonathon.”

“Kelly: bring me a recharged mobile telephone, it’s been at least 15 minutes since I last refreshed my RSS feeds. Sarah: jacket potato, beans and cheese. Jacqueline: prepare to vacuum the smell of the outside world off my jacket.”

“BUT I REALLY NEED SOME CHEESE RIGHT NOW SO PLEASE JUST LET ME AT IT EVEN JUST ONE SLICE OF THE OLD CHEDDAR THAT’S ALREADY OPEN”

“And there’s no need to use the remote control if you’re that close to it. You’re needlessly wasting the battery”.

“Miss IFA? Miss IFA? You’re supposed to hold this one on the floor. Put it down, like a broom. Like it’s a digital broom”.

“IT’S MISS IFA AND SHE IS IN TROUBLE!”